Jim Kelly Joseph, Machel Montano & Me

WWM: Wash Way Monday

I’ve started both Mondays of 2025, washed away in tears.

On January 6, 2025, the reality of my friend and Turks and Caicos Phenom, Jim Kelly Joseph’s passing began to truly sink in. There was no bootcamp, no calls, no big story of how he defied the odds as he braved the seas overnight, and we were meeting in his honour to begin to memorialize his likeness and legacy.

Monday, January 6, was also a very introspective and revealing day for me.

Even with the knowledge that this body, nor time is ours, and with the understanding that spirits never die and all things are for a lesson or reason, I was in disbelief. I was upset. I was engulfed in so much sadness and stress that, I ran out of tears and was just making ugly faces and sorrowful noises when the waves of grief crashed over my nervous system and left me worn in the surf. My menstrual cycle came 2 weeks early, I had a constant gnawing in my belly and an ache in my head.

WHAAATTTT?????!!!

Thing is, I’m not often moved so deeply, nor physically by death. Be it family, friends or workmates, I just kind of get on with it as I’ve been taught by the capitalistic, uncaring world. This time proved different.

THIS TIME?

The actual physical PAIN of this grieving process signaled to me that I was finally returning to myself, a welcomed truth that I noticed in the last quarter of 2024.

I realized that although I was riddled with grief and melancholy, I still was truly happy, because being true to myself and feelings, has allowed me to remember the joy, inspiration and fun that Jim Kelly brought to my life and those around him.

It allowed me to reminisce on the memories we‘ve made and feel sorrowful of all those that we would not.

To appreciate his reach, his impact and his value to this world, while devastated that it would not reach further or touch more.

I am grieving this hard, because I allowed myself to love him this hard, and that gives me pause, fills me with joy, and gives me purpose.

Yesterday, Monday January 13, I woke up to the King of Soca’s Tiny Desk. https://youtu.be/Y1f0WK9lsb0?si=S6G6js3ou7rMSdnN

Now, my relationship with Tiny Desk is a special one, as it has introduced me to some of the most phenomenal artists and performers, who were before npr’s series, unknown to me. Personally? It can be credited with broadening my musical tastes and creating a different appreciation for many new AND established artists.

Worldwide? It has launched and relaunched careers to its massive fan base and gave true music fans something to look forward to in a mainstream space, because as Maxwell truthfully declared during his appearance, you have to be the REAL DEAL to be featured on that platform. Unlike so many places that have no criteria for true art or skill these days, Tiny Desk don’t put on any ole nonsense.

So when I saw Machel Montano, I swole with pride and tears, a feeling I KNOW was not mine alone.

Montano himself, is an icon of performance, music, skill, evolution and hard work.

However, as large as HE himself is in our hearts and lives, I didn’t see HIM.

I saw SOCA, I saw the culture. The culture of which I am a part of.

Mirroring my Beautiful by Nature Turks and Caicos, sometimes feel I have an identity crisis. (That's a whole other blog, but lemme break it down for you)

My father is Vincention (from St. Vincent & The Grenadines), and while my mother was born in the Turks and Caicos Islands, she spent her formative years in the capital of the Caribbean, yes, Jamaica.

Between dialects, music choice, cuisine, friendship groups, customs and values, I basically grew up in CARICOM. I too, like Nadia Batson, am a proper Caribbean girl.

I’ve fallen in love with the stories, sounds, movements, and the men (wink wink) of Trinidad & Tobago, Barbados, Grenada, Montserrat, Haiti, St. Lucia, Guyana, Jamaica, Antigua, Dominica et al.

Sometimes though, through this love, admiration and attachment to so many, I found it to be frustrating to find the strongest thread of where I connected to the tapestry of life.

Today, I was reminded that I’m connected by many things, to THE THING, The Culture.

So you see SOCA? Old, New, Bashment, Bouyon, Sweet, Power, any and all? It is a spirit that inhabits my body through movement, flips my brain off from Matrix mode and conjurs the strength, love, joyfulness and energy of my ancestors. I feel it in every atom of my being. Euphoria. Connection. Blessings.

In times where I felt alone, left to figure out life on my own as a young lady, constantly being looked as “OTHER”, dealing with the trauma and bi-products of being robbed and raped in my own home, feeling unsafe, unable to sleep, traumatized and in need of healing? Soca was what connected me to thousands of years of ancestral strength through pulsating healing drum beats and intoxicating melodies. To good spirits, giving hope and bright eyed optimism that there is something to look forward to again, even if it just a short carnival season where you can let go of all things you are in life and enjoy who we are in spirit.

Soca invokes lasting happiness, doubles as a HEALTHY coping mechanism, and releases trauma through movement, while events with soca at it's nucleus, is always a big promoter of self love, unity and body acceptance. It turns strangers into friends with one glance, one wine, one lyric. Connected through sound and spirit, soca makes us all FAMALAY.

Monday morning when I heard Machel Montano say his name and where he is from, although I am not a Trinibagonian, I am a citizen of soca, and a citizen of the shared culture of the Caribbean. In that moment, the thing that saved me, the thing I am most connected to, that leads me back to before ships and whips and revolts, was center stage for all the world to see, well represented and received? With Pride, with excitement, with love and with reverence I bawl. I wine and I bawl, and I two step, and I bawl, and I ogly up myself and I bawl!

What a refreshing release, as opposed to a sorrowful one of last week.

*BEGINNING OF OFF TRACK BUT ON TRACK ADHD THOUGHT*

I tend to wonder about how young soca listeners hear and feel the music now.

What does it do for and to them? I wonder because it seems Soca and it's entities, like many genre’s and artforms, has begun taken on a very commercial, mechanical way of operating, sometimes sacrificing; artistry, spirit and true connection for personal gain and vanity, and “using a formula” to get a commercial hit, to sell out a fete, to over promise and under deliver experiences and costumes and promote 'status' in d events as opposed to connecting the now, to the then by stirring souls and stomping feet.

I also wonder, why is outside recognition THE GOAL?

And why are DJ's, promoters, artiste's and others willing to be so samey samey, mediocre and disconnected in order to achieve it?

Following trends instead of setting them?

Ya'll ain bored?

Maybe you're uninspired as well?

Why is MORE, or ALLLL becoming THE GOAL?

And I ask these questions because I look at someone like Machel Montano, who has gone from being ‘too young to soca’ to the ‘Monk’ with 40 years experience, who has rightly and organically gained his crown as the King of Soca, who has inspired countless artistes and promoters, raised the bar of performance in the Caribbean and has fused soca with so many other genre’s and worldwide artistes while not sacrificing the true spirit of the culture. True evolution. And here we are now, talking about him on Tiny Desk.

Then I think of some of my last experiences that have soca at the core of it like fetes, carnivals and music consumption. It has been lacking and disappointing. Over promising and under delivering, no soul, no feeling. Dan ga make it to no desk.

Mind you, the art reflects the times, and we are wallowing in shit worldwide right now, so, yeah, I get it, and I believe we will re-emerge from it, but will we ALL?

During evolutionary changes and world shifts, many things, persons, identities, traditions etc are lost.

Will WE make it?

Evolution is inevitable, as soca itself was an evolutionary explosion and marriage of genre, cultures and sounds, but the manipulation with intent to be palatable for recognition and to push sales as opposed to creating to make impact and feed souls, with economic safety as a bi product, is not sustainable and will not see long life.

Everything happens when it is supposed to, but many need to intentionally take up the torch of preservation, then light purpose, enjoyment, purity, excellence that will then light the way for , reverence in artistry, production, musicality, competition, comradery, showmanship and economic growth.

I believe those things will organically attract the right spirits, growth and notoriety that will help and not hurt d culture as we transition into whatever the next season of LOST God is throwing us into.

Big up to those who live in purity and respect for the artform, every time they hold a mic, play a chune, make a chune, create a vibe and atmosphere. Ya'll will last, and I will be in ya fete.

Chile anyway, let’s see, currently we are up in arms about Trinidad Killa, so we may get to it.

*END OF ADHD OFF TRACK BUT ON TRACK THOUGHT* Anyway, back to me hollering.

Oh Machel, you made my heart full.

I am hurting, but I am happy.

Oh SOCA, you made me heart swell !!! I am ready for the road lol.

However, I WILL NOT pitch up and go Trini carnival this year, as I usually do last minute, BUT……..I just may jump on the flight to Jersey to go to Boomtastic Soca event on Friday after all. Lewe see.

PS: I'm on my 8 watch, allyuh run d numbas up yes!

K bye!!!